Let their loving words envelop you in place of the hurtful ones. This vulnerability will open yourself up to receiving the love and healing you need. Let your guard down and reveal how the words made you feel. Someone who believes in you and can give you the comfort you need. If the words you heard were very painful, talk them through with someone you trust. Let your feelings work through you so that you can eventually release them. But first, allow yourself some time alone to simply feel. When you’re ready, you can work to counteract the words you heard.
Trying to ignore the pain will only allow it to sink deeper into your subconscious. Embrace the Painīelittling words hurt. Trying to pretend they didn’t happen is impossible. Have a nice day.” The simple fact that you refuse to engage with the person hoping to minimize you, is enough to remind yourself (and them) of your worth. If you can’t find the right words to defend yourself or you start to feel too anxious or intimidated, you can just say something simple like “Thanks so much for that insight. Instead, you can quickly and politely negate their statement and walk away. You don’t need to engage in a back and forth dialogue with someone who speaks down to you, at least not when your emotions feel overwhelming. Never allow people who use communication so irresponsibly to sabotage your self-image. The words they expressed reflect their truth, not yours. If someone feels they need to do that to feel empowered, they have some things they need to work through. Belittling or condescending people is never a necessary or productive form of dialogue. When someone belittles you, it’s a reflection of the speaker, not the recipient. The next time you’re on the receiving end of such words, use the following steps to help you recover: Remember the Truth About Belittling Words If you’ve fallen prey to those who belittle and have allowed their harsh words to penetrate the vulnerable parts of your mind and heart, you know how damaging those words can be.
My self-esteem was worth fighting for and I had the power to choose the words I believe in. And what you accept as true, you live out.Įventually, I realized that this was unacceptable. Without consciously realizing, I’d eventually accept the words I heard as true. My intuition would tell me not to trust the words I heard, but my soul would ache with shame and insecurity. In the past, I allowed these remarks to infiltrate my self-worth. Like most of us, I’ve been faced with belittling remarks. If we’re not careful, we can turn someone’s demeaning remarks into our internalized truths. We come across as quiet, easy going, emotional or “soft.” Seemingly easy targets for those who belittle others to feel empowered.Īnd because we internalize negativity so strongly, those belittling comments can sink in deeply. 1.Sometimes sensitive or introverted souls fall into a trap. While you can definitely tweak these tips to fit your individual needs, putting some of the following techniques into action might make a big difference when it comes to facing down a potential guilt trip. The right tools can help you be prepared to say "no," and to do it effectively. But the bottom line is that it isn't always rude to say "no" - and, indeed, that it's the person who's trying to guilt trip who is being rude.
It might not be easy our culture often teaches us that it's rude to say "no," so going against that ingrained lesson can feel uncomfortable. But as Jamie Turndorf, PhD, points out at Psychology Today, "Nobody can take you on a guilt trip, if you aren’t willing to pack your bags and take the ride." While some situations are much harder to get out of than others - say, if someone has authority or is in a position of power over you, or if they're playing your heartstrings on a sensitive subject - it is always true that you do have a voice. When someone starts trying to lead you on guilt trip, it's easy to feel like you're basically trapped in the situation. Whether or not they're making you feel guilty on purpose, it doesn't excuse their behavior, and you're always justified in standing up for yourself and letting them know where your boundaries are. That's why it's so important to be able to say "no" even when someone is guilt-tripping you.
It's annoying, to say the least - so how do you respond when someone tries to guilt trip you? In the moment, it's almost always easier to say "yes," but in the long-term, this strategy can be detrimental to your own emotional and mental wellbeing indeed, depending on what someone is asking of you, agreeing to it because you'll feel guilty if you don't can lead you into stressful or even dangerous circumstances. We've all encountered at least one person over the course of our lives who somehow always manages to make us feel guilty for things that we really don't have to feel guilty about.